Thursday, September 15, 2005
The One with the Dedication

Staticidiot has decided to type in the 3rd person for the next few entries on this blog. He has finally manage to get radio.blog to work on his blogspot. But that is after spending close to a whole day figuring out how the dumb program works. For a programming idiot like him, it will be a miracle if he figured the tunings of the html scripts. Now, staticidiot is trying to use the same FTP client to set up a web-page that serves as a blog too. Which means that it will probably take him about one gazillion years before anyone will see the background of the web.

Staticidiot is currently having a conversation with one of the most obnoxious horse in the whole of Singapore, not to mention smartest, since no horse in history( or any animal closely resembling a horse ) has ever attended classes/lectures or turtorials at a Junior College. ( except for maybe the school cat. But that is not so much the focus of this entry ) Somehow, thanks to a freak accident ( irony? ) which left Staticidiot the ability to communicate with even the wildest animals on planet Earth ( say a cow ) , he managed to survive almost 2 years in school while pursuing a higher understanding of the human anatomy. Why is it you may ask? The reason is the simplest of the simple. Because his class is 03S2, is also known as the Class of the Animals.

Firstly, with no need of any introduction, there is huda the horse. This female, long face EQUUS CABALLUS has a temper which is responsible for the past few earthquakes in Mount Saint Helens Area, Washington. After making continuous neighing with no audible end ( or in simple words that a normal human mind will understand, a big fuss ), there is no wonder why she is the reason why Staticidiot have to write this entry. Like everything on Earth who cannot be truly good or evil ( except God and Saturn ) she also have her good points. She does bring good food from her home ( which is located at the famous Singapore Polo Club ) although this blessed event is as few as cockles in a S$0.50 Fried Kwee Tiao.

Next up will be Hafizah the Toad. There isn't any doubt that this toad is the horniest of the horny. As the saying goes, to be horny as a Toad is to be Hafizah. There are times when this toad actually effectively controls her hormornes. However, as soon as her Oestrogen Levels goes beyong a certain, she starts harrassing the other male animals in the class, for e.g Jin Hua the pimply Cat or Bryan the wide-eyed Bull, whom by the way aren't magnificent creatures. For this toad, her dream to become Ecko the Prince's wife is the only thread that is restraining her from raping the country's entire male population. ( and that includes the tortises in Jurong Lake )

After introducing 2 of the animal population of 03S2, Staticidiot realised that he had not yet introduced himself to the general public. ( and that is not like him, this ungentlemenly way. ) Staticidiot, who is currently typing this entry to atone for his sins, plays one of the more crucial roles in the class. Yes. Keeping the class sane. Apart from being the sanity-keeper, he is also the arch-enemy of Bryan the Wide-Eyed Bull, for reasons even he himself cannot comprehend. He saves the weak and feed the poor and everytime there is a need for funds to do so, he steals from the rich and famous! One can say that his deeds are comparable to Robin Hood of Sheerwood Forest. For now, the humble him shall return to introducing the rest of the fellowship.

Just after Staticidiot finished the last word of the previous paragraph, a cow appeared on MSN Messenger. And this leads to the next animal of the class. Kirrthana the Cow. Kirrthana is in Human Terms, what people will call shameless. Apart from the fact that she always insist on people calling her Kitty ( when she is obviously a cow ), she never fails to irritate ( what she calls entertain ) the class with her resounding voice. When she moos, the whole establishment trembles. With this shameless act of "entertaining", she got an award in debating. Prize Money and all, never did she once treat the ones closest to her ( or the ones who knows her aching secrets ) any meals. Not only that, she demands tributes to be given to her just because she is, well, her.

Next animal worth a place in this entry is Jin Hua the pimply Feline. As much as he or she likes ( no one in the class came close to discovering his gender ), there is no way his face will be as smooth as a marble. For with the amount of face-cleanser this Feline uses, one can probably make the Taj Mahal shine. Staticidiot cannot deny the fact that he is very hard-working. The only thing that he does apart from prining himself is study, study and study. For that, he achieved grades which are worth his effort and no one should take that away from him. Although most of the day, he tries to be as elegant as a swan, as innocent as a lamb and as harmless as a rabbit, when the need calls for it, Jin Hua will bare his claws and transform into a ferocious feline, capable only of killing a fly.

Closely linked to this feline is the spouse. A very stoic believer of Christianity, Karen the Poodle. Do not be deceive by her looks ( or gender ), she is one not to be trifled with. With a amazing hair-do and a snow-white skin, nobody can steal her spouse away from her. With the exception of Hui Zhen the Duck.

Hui Zhen the Duck shall be the last animal Staticidiot will be introducing tonight for dawn is breaking and Staticidiot must return to his coffin to sleep. The Duck as many will know belongs to the Anatidae along with swans and geese. There isn't much to describe about her for most of her character co-incides with a duck. Therefore, to introduce her will be like describing the daily habits of a duck, which can easily be found on the net. However, one thing to highlight about her is that when she falls down, it isn't graceful or anything. The way Hui Zhen falls is more like a woodedn dummy. Landing in the exact position while standing.

That is all for tonights entry.

And May the Lord Bless All~

p.s: Old McDonald have a farm.....