Thursday, March 16, 2006
House of Wax... what?

As of today, I finished every single episode of Gilmore Girls Season 1. Yeah, even the special features! And also the 3 DVDs that I bought yesterday. House of Wax, Just Like Heaven and Chicken Little.

And also, I'm a CPL liao~

Initially, I wanted to type my movie reviews for House of Wax and Just Like Heaven de. But the idea got lost sometime between the death of Jared Padalecki and the impalment of Paris Hilton's character. Okay... maybe one review...




HOUSE OF WAX ( SPOILER ALERT )

The whole movie revolves around town with a building made of wax, ( thus the Movie Title ) and it's very interesting residents. So you see, these 6 friends ( 2 of which acted in Gilmore girls, Jared Padalecki and Chad Michael Murray to be exact) were heading towards this fabulous baseball game when this "bright", black guy ( no pun intended ) decided to take a shortcut so as to reach their destination earlier.

Now, if you think that they are going to find this "shortcut" really short without any road blocks or whatever, it is obvious that you haven't seen enough horror flicks, BECAUSE that never happens. Unless the movie is like 6 minutes long or it is a road show.

Fast-forwarding, the 6 friends found themselves camping out in a eerie and SMELLY place, which is once again, typical of a horror flick. Blah, blah, blah. Spoilt NEW car which boy refuses to leave behind, sexy female lead whom the killer video taped ...

**I'm not referring to Paris Hilton, to side-track a little, she is maybe the worst supporting actress I've ever seen! You should have seen me dancing around in my kilt the moment she died in the movie. Heavens! The only reason why she has a reality TV show, A Simple Life, is probably due to the fact that all the producers and directers in the world knows that she cannot act for nuts! That's why they came out with the whole reality TV conspiracy to cover up her ass ( which every male in the world have had seen at least once ). Yes! I bet that A Simple Life, initially was a movie. But, after around 10 of the directors went to the asylum for reported Temporary Directing Disorder. I quote" Paris Hilton is a woman of questionable values." Well you know the rest**

... and my Dad's smoking again. I can smell it from my room! God! Please wave that arm and remove cigarettes from the face of Earth...

back to topic. I don't have any mood to type any more.. hmmm strange thing, I just had the strangest conversation with my mom.
Anywayz, Paris Hilton deserves to die. Jared Padalecki deserves to die, and I pretty sure that almost all the males on Earth thinks that Robert Ri'Chard deserves to die. So now, we are left with Jon Abrahams. No, he didn't really deserve to die but I guess he has to since if you notice, horror movies normally ends with only 2 people alive. Typical..

I guess the best part of the film must be the scenes around the end of the moive. Yesh! I'm talking about the whole wax house burning down. There's this "welcome to hell" theme going on, I bet! Really! If you focus on all the views, especially when they film it from the top, you see fire everywhere! The scene could easily pass as something from Constantine! I love that one. Okay, maybe that's the only scene I which I find interesting. And oh, there's also the part where Bo ( or is it Vincient ) went slipping into the melted floor, like he's being sucked into the depths of hell, which by the way, is totally appropriate, judging from the number of people he killed.

This movie is worth 2.5 Almond Jellies out of 5!
Reason: It's got everything that a horror movie has to offer. But just not enough content and violence to seperate itself from other horror flicks. Except of course, Paris Hilton. She is a horror herself.



ciaoz~

p.s: Sorry to be blasting Paris Hilton. I guess that I need to give her some credit for her superb acting in " 1 Night in Paris" co-starring Rick Salommon.

p.p.s: I think Paris Hilton will love to be wax-terized. Than she wouldn't have to worry about showing her good side to the camera, thinking of words to use except "WADEVA", shaving her legs, earn for a living, oh! and deciding which movie to be in so she could terrorize the audiences with her lack of acting skills. ( okay the last one is from me )

p.p.s: My mom started comparing me with the chnl 8, 9 o' clock show's blind girl. Saying how independent that person was.. I told her that it IS a television programme, that is how people are suppose to behave, either super good or super bad. blah blah blah... But she chose to ignore my comments and continued to talk about how lazy I am, reminding me that today is thursday ( yesh i know how to read a calender, thank you ) and implying that I'm wasting my life away... blah blah blah... seriously, parents still do that now? I guess the Be A Good Kid Trend is not popular anymore. Well, I suppose she's expecting me to run away from home someday with a pregnant girl in tow. Than she can happily say: Well, that's my boy.